In the late hours of August 19, 2008, Russian scientists succeeded in a project to cut apart and reassemble dogs.  Biotechnicians in at lease twenty countries have been trying to accomplish this feat for several decades now, but it was not until last night until somebody reported success.

When asked about this feat, Dr. Vladimir Prokofski simply answered “it was bound to happen, and I’m glad we were the ones to do it”.  He then secretly – or so he thought – removed a vial of super glue from his lab coat pocket and began to sniff it.  Reporters then asked if the superglue was involved in the project in any way, and Dr. Prokofski declined to answer, saying the interview was over, turning around, and walking away wagging his freshly glued-on tail.

American scientists also declined to comment on this accomplishment, stating that they would only give interviews if and when they are able to replicate the results obtained by the Russian scientists.